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The “Telespargel” and the “Lange Lulatsch” - the Berliners nicknames for it’s sights

Imagine you would experience a city tour through Berlin with a real Berliner explaining the awkward sounding,

characteristic Berliner names for all the sights: We meet up at Langen Lulatsch from there we go to see the “Wasserklops”. After that we visit “den Hohlen Zahn, Lippenstift und Puderdose before we take the S-Bahn to Alexanderplatz. Here, all the shopping fans can go crazy “im rosaroten Bunker”. We take a little break at the “Nuttenbrosche”, where you can also stop by Café Achteck. Next stop is the Telespargel, passing the “Suppenschüssel” to take the Bus 100 to the Brandenburger Tor. From the “Brandenburger Tor” you can take a glimpse at the Goldelse and last but not least we visit the “Hungerkrake”.

After that long day of moving around and way too difficult german words, we spend a relaxed evening at the Tempelhofer Feld, which is the huge area of an abandoned airport. 
The following day we will go on visiting “Sacco und Jacketti”, Schwangere Auster and stop by the “Waschmaschine”. From there you can take a ride “jana far out”.

And now after all that confusion… here a little explanation for all the Berlin Sightseeing Madness:

Us Berliners, we carry our heart on the tong. No wonder, as Berlin is a colourful, artistic city, we create our own little names for all the sights here, they can sound very funny and weird sometimes. 
In the district “Berlin Charlottenburg” close to the famous Kurfürstendamm you can visit the “Weltkugel am Breitscheidplatz”, which is a something like a fountain with a globe statue. But who would ever keep that name in mind? Its way easier to call it “Wasserklops”(water meatball). Right next to that you can see the Memorial Church of Kaiser Wilhelm. The tower ruin is called “der Hohle Zahn”(hollow tooth) and the belltower and the main building of the church are called “Lippenstift und Puderdose”(lipstick and powder tin). 
All over Berlin you can see green little houses, that serve as public toilettes. They do not look so bad but Berliners call them “Café Achteck”(café octagon) which sounds a little nicer. The “Alexanderplatz” is an inviting location to browse around and do some shopping, especially in the big red shopping centre Alexa, which reminds Berliners of a “rosaroten Bunker”(pink bunker).

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In front of the former airport Tempelhof you can visit the “Luftbrückendenkmal” at the “Platz der Luftbrücke”…what a long name right? That’s why we call it simply “Hungerkrake”(hungry talon). The Marx-Engels Memorial designed by Ludwig Engelhardt is located in Berlin-Mitte. It represents the 2 godfathers of the communism Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels but we call them simply “Sacco und Jacketti”. 

Next to the garden “Lustgarten” in front of the museum Altes Museum you can see a nice statue of a granite bowl that Berliners title as “Suppenschüssel”(soup bowl). On Alexanderplatz there is a fountain called “Brunnen der Völkerfreundschaft” which is called “Nuttenbrosche”(hooker brooch) for its colourful paintings and the prostitution in this area. Another famous sight located at Alexanderplatz is the TV Tower with a hight of 365 meters. But Berliners call it lovingly the “Telespargel”(TV-Asperagus). When you arrive in Berlin by car you can already take a glimpse at the “Funkturm” while entering the city, here we call it “der Lange Lulatsch”( the huge beanpole). It’s around 150m high and on 135m hight there is a viewing platform. 
The Berlin congress hall, seat and organisation point of the House of the Cultures has the nickname “Schwangere Auster” (pregnat ouster).
The “Siegessäule” that you can already see standing by the "Brandenburger Tor” has a little figur on top of it which represents a golden statue of Victoria the goddess of victory. As it’s so shiny even from afar we call it the “Goldelse” (which is like a golden bird). 
Of course, the Chancellery of the government district needed a name too, and this is "washing machine". Well, when we go on our region with its endless expanses, then we go "janz far out”(very far out).

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